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re: Improve this sentence?  Mongrol  21 Aug 08 9:57AM Thread Closed

> Well you are truly the expert on being a bore, nobody wishes to
> deprive you of that accolade- would you like a ten or two for shit
> behaviour.
> What ever NetskyIam thinks he will no doubt tell me. He certainly does
> not need you to operate any strings on his behalf.

I do as I will Mor, again you overstep an imagined authority you think you have here. You don't have any, simply. :)

Would you like me to pretend to be your young 'nephew' to heat up your inspiration? That last set of verse was awful. Really awful. Try and improve was the remit Mor, not make worse.

Try again please.

~ Mong

re: Improve this sentence?  Mongrol  21 Aug 08 9:59AM Thread Closed

> why would you think that it needs to be improved? check that rhythm
>
> she first stepped on
> the london stage
> in 1882
>
> there is a perfectly metered rhyming poem screaming to be released
> from this sentence. i think it's a great little sentence!

that's very true chuckles, but using a METER isn't to everyone's ability, as that last set of poorly metered verse shows ;)

re: Improve this sentence?  unknown  21 Aug 08 10:47AM Thread Closed

Mor has his own special touch too. Something mong will never ever equal if judging by what he has posted up to date on PC.

re: Improve this sentence?  unknown  21 Aug 08 11:49AM Thread Closed

Here is a little bed time story for mong the metre specialist

Never mind said the rat
to the little putty cat
As she sat by the fireside alone
If you fancy a chat
and can chew the fat
Then we’ll go for it
like a dog with a bone.

re: Improve this sentence?  Mongrol  21 Aug 08 11:52AM Thread Closed

> Mor has his own special touch too. Something mong will never ever
> equal if judging by what he has posted up to date on PC.


LOL so OBVIOUSLY a mor comment praising mor. Is the no end to this man's brazen self accolades?

lol :)

re: Improve this sentence?  Mongrol  21 Aug 08 11:52AM Thread Closed

> Here is a little bed time story for mong the metre specialist


it's METER for poetry you absolute dumbass! :)

re: Improve this sentence?  unknown  21 Aug 08 12:08PM Thread Closed

It is only dumb ass school kids who use meter in the UK the arts have always favoured metre much as they do in sport.
I have two medals both inscribed to me in recognition of my winning races of both five thousand and ten thousand metres. I wonder why such an august authority should make such a mistake maybe you should write and tell them of your wonderful knowledge.
Of course I did win them long before you were born little boy.

re: Improve this sentence?  unknown  21 Aug 08 12:59PM Thread Closed

I wish that I could wait on with thee
down by the briny sea.
Where ships they sail o’er oceans so wide
and I must hide from me.

It was but of a laughter’s form
that nature gave a peace
and all those steps that I perform
are but a soul’s release.

re: Improve this sentence?  unknown  21 Aug 08 1:45PM Thread Closed

> I wish that I could wait on with thee
> down by the briny sea.
> Where ships they sail o’er oceans so wide
> and I must hide from me.
>
> It was but of a laughter’s form
> that nature gave a peace
> and all those steps that I perform
> are but a soul’s release.

So beat the wave and tack the wind
lest let all its sense avail.
When you are all but homeward bound
let its mercy fill the sail.

For the wind it blows like seasons change
and danger lies where ere it range.
Whilst I wait on that shore so bare
and mornings light is so lonely there..

re: Improve this sentence?  unknown  21 Aug 08 2:07PM Thread Closed

> > I wish that I could wait on with thee
> > down by the briny sea.
> > Where ships they sail o’er oceans so wide
> > and I must hide from me.
> >
> > It was but of a laughter’s form
> > that nature gave a peace
> > and all those steps that I perform
> > are but a soul’s release.
>
> So beat the wave and tack the wind
> lest let all its sense avail.
> When you are all but homeward bound
> let its mercy fill the sail.
>
> For the wind it blows like seasons change
> and danger lies where ere it range.
> Whilst I wait on that shore so bare
> and mornings light is so lonely there..

For the silhouette on that silver sea
gives hope that it may be of thee.
When they tall ships sail up the Tyne
I know that all those joys are mine.
and all of those sad leavings so
are dead where all sad thoughts they go.

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