poetry critical

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queue haiku
hank

slated in a slot
 1
i find myself wallowing
 2
neither here nor there
 3

31 Aug 04

Rated 8.5 (8.5) by 2 users.
Active (2):
Inactive (4): 7, 7, 8, 9, 10, 10

(define the words in this poem)
(455 more poems by this author)

(2 users consider this poem a favorite)



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Comments:

L1 !!
 — cfaber

pretty good.
 — Charlie

Why is it that I have to count sylables every time I see a Haiku?  I know that it's going to be a 5-7-5 poem, but I still count.

Oh yeah, CAPITALIZE.
 — leonxic

no thanks
 — hank

Short and sweet.  Me likes.
 — FemmeInLA

First of all, I highly, intensly disagree with leonxic. This doesn't need capitals letters. No individual word or letter in it is so important that it needs to be raised above the others - it's a poem like that. It's a poem about being in limbo, of waiting, but not even actively waiting, of just existing in a place that's not one thing but not the alternative. And you wallow. Brilliant word to use there.

Well done. I love good haiku.
 — KibBen

I have always loved haiku.
I wouldnt add capitols either.
 — art_n_ash

nice one.

thank queue.
: )
 — fractalcore

Wonderful!  Loved it.
 — sybarite

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