|the example of Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield died today
i wasn't much of a fan of his;
that is i didn't much like his act
but i wish him well where he's going.
we grow old against our wishes
we abuse ourselves;
against our body commit indecencies
of cigarettes, caffeine, comedy and beer.
if i wished to be old i would stop all this
the foolishness of drink;
cigarettes by the truckload
but even Rodney's stubborn body made it to 82.
6 Oct 04
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Hmmmmmm.... this is a nice comment.
I would actually re-visit for CAPitalization at beginning of certain lines and stronger punctuation and line breaks.
Overall, this is great.
uninspired waste of words.
This is not exactly poetry but it's a gentle tribute to life and living - oh, yes, and to Mr. Dangerfield.
Hehe I like this. Trying to look for some hint of sexual innuendo, but I fail to see it here. I think it's a sweet reflection on life, especially liked the second and third stanzas. Not a bad effort hank boy.
I salute you for this, Hank. Finally someone wrote a tribute to Rodney not expecting to get paid. That's real heart.
Why Rodney? Even posthumously...HE GETS NO RESPECT.
good point. a lesson for all you health nuts. all the wheatgrass and echinacea in the world won't save your skinny little asses from the reaper.
You can't just write anything at all, break it into four line stanzas, and call it a poem. This is just a bad paragraph randomly distributed to look like a poem, but there's nothing poetic about it.
I can see your point about caffeine, beer and cigarettes, but how is "comedy" an "indecency against our body". That's just weird.
Aside from that, Rodney contributed a lot to the world despite any "bad habits" you think he had. And 82 is a pretty good run. He made millions of people laugh in a world with too many miserable, overly judgmental people in it. Sorry, but this poem makes you sound like one of them.
Hey--this is a good comment on the man that "got no respect".
Even in death, he still gets NO respect!!
Where he's going... hell? And you didn't say anything about COCAINE. You know rodney did a shitload of coke. Look at him touch his nose.
Not much of a poem, though.
I hope i do too,but i very much doubt it,my excesses are against me.