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duckboy
| She said not to worry, | 1 |
November will always come | 2 |
back. And | 3 |
| 4 |
she told me not to wonder, | 5 |
because time is the same | 6 |
no matter where you land. And | 7 |
| 8 |
she said we were lovely in | 9 |
our brevity, and we should | 10 |
never try to change time. And | 11 |
| 12 |
I believed, and let go | 13 |
of one November, | 14 |
and gave it to her. | 15 |
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8 Jan 03 |
Rated 7.3 (7.2) by 11 users.
Active (11): 4, 6, 6, 7, 7, 8, 8, 8, 10, 10
Inactive (38): 1, 1, 2, 3, 4, 4, 5, 5, 6, 6, 6, 6, 7, 7, 7, 7, 7, 7, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10
(define the words in this poem)
(15 users consider this poem a favorite)
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Comments:
this is something spectacular, I think... line 7 into 8 is amazing, but I'm sure you know that. The first and last stanza (especially the last) are perfect bookends. the second stanza is, of course, great as well but I think I like it most for "land. And" which just sounds so damn nice.
— unknown
I really like this. Short and sweet.
— allie
beautifully encapsles what seemed to be an autumn fling
— Loni
so hot.
— jade
Damnit, someone give this poem the attention it deserves.
— unknown
Yar, this is very good indeed.
— Moose
this is so, so good. I don't think it could be any better.
— unknown
Beautifully written.
— heatherS
I disagree with the first commenter. I don't like the "land. And" only because nothing else in that poem has that type of wordplay. It doesn't really fit, you know? I love the last stanza though. I know the "and"s are pretty much the whole point of the poem, but I can't decide whether I like them or not.
— Ananke
i like the "land. and", but it bothers me also because it's the only instance of that type on rhyme. and the and's are pretty, but less so when they're pointed to loudly by the title. i think you should not call it and, unless, the name of the girl was ann, in which case, by her fling, you were Anned.
— gnormal
I really like this. it's simple and brief and powerful.
— bellis
of course, pun-master-extraordinare gnormal would be the one to say something like that.
— jade
isn't the saying, "brevity is the soul of wit?" i like clever things, which this is.
— kore
this is almost musical...
— luella
Quacktastic!
— onklcrispy
i didn't realize till now how pretty this is...good job
— SeraphSoul
Duck, how come you only have one poem? You are such an amazing poet. I only want to read more of your stuff.
— smiles05
The last two stanzas really do it for me.
— flyfire
Wow, why is this so dang dormant? Great freakin' poem. Don't you have more?
[Don't worry about the "land. And" connundrum. It's just a quibble to some of us, but hardly breaks the overall feel. In fact, it sort of sets off the central point of the poem.]
— zepplin42
this is a school stuff poem that you read in school
— nelson
How about an "And" at the end, too!
— aforbing
aforbing! is that really you?
— unknown
Of course it's me, silly. Would I make these insanely brave comments and sincere critiques if it were not me? Glad to see my notoriety has not died. Who might you be, "unknown"???
— aforbing
Why is And being emphasized. The poem could live without the Ands including the title, I notice, so it makes me wonder about the plurality suggested by the word And. Am I only confusing myself? hehe.
— quiddity
I like the rhythm of the lines and really appreciate the shortness and sweetness of this one. i really like this.
— 8Gj00
i still find this amazing.
you are lovely in your brevity.
— jade
awesomely lovely in its brevity - a beautiful poem
— space
damn u ppl, where the hell r the christmas poems u freaks?!?!? god, no one here can write good christmas poems....
— unknown
Well... I took a stab at a Christmas poem and got TOTALLY shot down for it. In fact, I was hit up by the "Poetic God" who comes on here and informs you that your poem is "NOT A POEM". Yeah... What an ASSHOLE. He gets on and says pompously that your poem is "NOT A POEM". Like someone died and made him the almighty literary judge of all things poetic. Watch out for him and don't take ANYTHING he/she says to heart. Tell him to blow it out his asshole.
— aforbing
reminds me of the movie Sweet November
— TaylorC
love the way the and is put on the end of the line instead of the beginning of the next.
it reminds me of the way a young child pauses during speech. i like that.
— shakeit
Sweet November the film?
Was this gacked from a scene in that?
It sounds like it came right out of that film.
— unknown
I love the last stanza. It's beautiful. Also, the word 'and' isn't in it, making it a whole lot better.
I'm not a huge fan of the 'and' thing, though. I think ending each line with 'and' makes the poem to choppy. In fact, if You read it without the 'and' it sounds much better, much more smooth.
Then, the title 'and' brings more emphasis to the word 'and' and the focus of the poem is lost. The first time I read it I was so caught up in the 'and's I had to reread it again to really even get a sense of the poem. I think the title 'November' would work.
— abby
absolutely lovely
— sasha277
just lovely. simply a lovely poem. sweet, sincere, simple, yet vivd in its lack of descriptions. can feel the genteel nature of that november. yes, it maybe should be titled november, 'and' doesnt add much to the poem.
— wendz
i bet you gave it to her good and hard....when she came back.
— unknown
beautiful
— AEOS
We are all asking this, why is there only one poem by you? ? ? We want more!
— unknown
Well I did some "research" and your last visit was reportedly on "Jan/2003." So it's been awhile. Maybe you've died "Duckboy"... that's so sad. Where are you?!!You're pulling one of those "finding forrester" things arn't you? Where you release one book, the public swarms over their love for it, and then you torment us by not releasing another one. Damn you!
But then again, maybe you did die. And now all your legacy is this ONE wonderful, beautiful work of art. But it's still sad.
— unknown
what in the world?
I guess its good, but there are some others in the "top rated" that I would like to see more toward the top.
— Ozymandias
i really like the concept, your words fit together nicely. & i liked how you ended the last stanza with that sort of confused way. the metaphor is good coz then it keeps people guessing. i <3'd it.
— dismantleme
A sweet poem...very nicely written!
— azalea
I like the last stanza. It is a lovely short poem.
— Hquartz
You know what this poem reminds me of? Those AT&T commercials.
— abby
God, I still love this.
— wendz
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