|A personal verse for a Pc poet. Open to suggestions, always|
aforbing is apopular fellow
afording agrace kindly, mellow.
aforbing's aaffable in his verse
aforbing outshines adarker's dearths.
aforbing, afriend, though not a Quaker,
apouring his sands to blot ink apaper;
aforbing absorbing the excess inks
of those who fail acleanly, to think.
now see aforbing
a via aforbing.
a way that is always,
sounding and leading
aforbing: awell, ameasured,
8 Feb 05
Rated 1 (4.3) by 1 users.
Inactive (5): 1, 1, 1, 7, 8, 9
(define the words in this poem)
(181 more poems by this author)
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I guess I am still loved, altho I have dried up and haven't written in forever.
Either that or someone is kissing my ass for some unknown reason???
kissing ass? Uh, readers may decide by signed postings what incited this poem
Hooray for Morchius aforbing 7 Feb 05 7:44PM Post Reply
and Netsky for sticking it out and staying with us.
it makes life more interesting.
and there... you... are... not an "ass kiss" but an honorarium paid
Jeez... I'm so damn complimentary...
what can I say?
Opal writes KICK ASS poems.
We want Opal, we want Opal!!!!!!
???? Ha ha, but I'm lost!! I want Opal, too, even here in my poem's/your poem's commentary! What gives? (I get lost easily) -netsky-
someone was insinuating that we were playing "you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours".... so I scratched Opal's back. I love her poetry.
Yeah, well it IS about scratching backs, only without -expecting or needing- more strokes in repay. The gift of the verse is my ample reward becaus I SEE that it excited you and you spread your "stoke-ed-ness" on to others. This is called by me "pond rippling" and I do not but set the first, fanning ripples into action. And I did this because =you= set me to thinking serious about how best to acknowlege your unsolicited, unexpected public support of me on that fucked message board. -You did not preconceive this result- , but in effect you manipulated -me- and so i pay you back the only way I can: to make you better and stronger and more invincible too. You owed me nothign and still owe me nothing. Virtue is yours. And your virtuous personality is contagious. -netsky-
meh... not that great as a poem, but it's amusing to read :P
i enjoyed it for that reason. so i give it a 7.
thanks, AEOS.. it is -not- posed up as any great poem. I don't suppose I ever wrote a "great poem" If I take satisfaction in anything I've made from nothing, it is the "genre" of this sort of personal verse made for internet poets never met but merely sensed from their writings. Perhaps I've invented a new form of poetry: in this so-termed "personal verse" lightly made for others met via this new medium. It is my favorite way to write, now. I never worry about 'quality' per se.. but only fit them with -sincerity-. This makes the verse genuine. I've made so many of these. And each seems to be a treasure to the recipient. And so, to please myself and to please a recipient; affirming the recipient is indeed worthy of public note.. make me really happy. I am not a competitive guy, not really.. I am a happy and giving guy 'cause what I give here cost me absolutely nothing. The gift is renewable and tends to cause more people to think about their poet-brothers and sisters in a new light: as if we are really more a family than warring factions of gang members. The only way to get along overall is to tolerate every poet and every person we encounter... who does not attack us by way of his own assertion, as did secret coward commenter number 2 in this commentary list. Thanks.. much obliged to get a number rating, too. I don't deserve it, though. -netsky- can't type or proof
*damn* nice twist, good rhythm ... cool stuff ... and a lot of fun
I guess I will just have to trust your testament. You are very creative and I also think that the title 'pc poet' does hold a bit of irony but in a good sense. We all seem to be sailing in the same pc poetry boat. It feels strange at times. Maria
Lia read this poem and smiled. She found it exceedingly clever and somewhat cute, and thinks aforbing is lucky to have a nice poem for/about them.
Her only question is whether aforbing is male or female, since this poem claims they are a him, and aforbing themself did not dipute that, but Lia thinks she remembers reading somewhere that aforbing is actually a female?
But Lia is sure you're correct, and believes that if aforbing wanted the gender in the poem changed, they would have said so themself.
revised slightly one year later.
nicolecote: you spew hate and I don't even know you.
I gave one of your poems a twenty minute critique and this was my payback(above).
im thinking u made some words up>? or idk
if i acutally knew wha tthe words meant @$(*&
id be able to understand it, but maybe it wasnt meant
to be understood?
i dont think this poem makes any sence what so ever
Of course the later poems are better.
This was one of my first writings.
I only wrote my first poem in Oct. of '04.
And it has been a learning curve.
I am still a rank beginner.
Let these early dogs lie still, eh?
aforbing is a great poet.
probably the only interesting thing here is your neo-forms. it's a more radical move than the kind you're making now, and maybe it's that you're getting old and stodgy. i appreciate that, here, you realized that poetry was about inventing language. of course, the rhyming and scan are not very good, but i wouldn't expect that from someone who doesn't really "like" poetry to be poetry.
Gee, Joey, thanks. That was made in feb. o5. I first read or wrote a "poem" three months before.
Before October of o4, what was I doing? More productive things---not poetry sitz baths.
i'm sorry you couldn't understand my critique, but i can't really reword it because it's about craft and not attitude. i could maybe paraphrase and say that it says you were good-good in making up words, and that making words is good-good. happy-happy, and good luck in Word Of Life bake off and poetry recital next sunday.
How I might revise it today (have not looked at this thing for two years, maybe)
aforbing as a apopular fellow
afords agrace kindly, amellow.
aforbing--aaffable in his verse.
aforbing alights adarker's dearth.
aforbing, afriend, although not aQuaker;
apouring his sands to blot ink apaper.
aforbing, absorbing access ink
of those who fail to so clean athink.
I now see aforbing
abell ringer's peace-path;
a via aforbing.
away that is always
sounding, this leading;
aforbing: all well, ameasured,
it's still just shallow writing because you really haven't anything to say, but you're saying it in an ostensibly school yard sing-song? yes? as "irony", no? it's a cheap thought for a cheap construction, of a cheap idea. other than that, it's not very well written even as cheap. good cheap is sexy and fun.
I had forgotten about this one...
Too damn funny, Net. Gotta love the sing-song quality of it.
I'm happy to have inspired.
Now, if I could just find my own muse.
That used to be IMC, but she just doesn't do it for me anymore. I think of her as a friend only. >>>Sorry, Miss Iz, I gots to tell it like it is<<<
~the decidedly NOT quaker "aforbing"
Well, humph! Since I know all the sneaky truths about you, I am content to have it this way, believe me.
It's hard work being someone's muse, more fun to be someone's 'amus'ing."
OMG! Take me back... This was really great for an early attempt. Reason being, it has that really cool trait (not unlike Lewis Carol) of making words up that make sense in context. It is brave for a second offering (again--hard to believe this is only your second poem) to be so catchy. I give it a 9. (of course, I'm biased)
Taking me back to the past...
Lovin' it. Thanks Netsky! :)