| Requiem
|
larrylark
| You ask what I like? | 1 |
Sitting, arms folded, opposite T.V. | 2 |
remote or three nearby, | 3 |
in a place where my face always fits. | 4 |
A bit of a laugh when I act daft, | 5 |
plus a pimple that reminds me why | 6 |
life's not flawless, | 7 |
with feet marooned | 8 |
in comfortable old shoes, | 9 |
cardboard cocoons, | 10 |
slipped in the soles to cover the holes. | 11 |
Sup a few beers, play some pool, | 12 |
and fit snug as flock wallpaper | 13 |
glued to the fabric of every day, | 14 |
nothing memorable, | 15 |
nothing to say. | 16 |
|
9 May 05 |
Rated 8.5 (8.7) by 2 users.
Active (2):
Inactive (3): 8, 8, 9, 9, 9
(define the words in this poem)
(677 more poems by this author)
|
Add A Comment:
|
Comments:
i understand where this is coming from. line 12, "sip".
— aerol
'sup' - not sure that one crosses the pond Larry :0)
Playful, sad, hopefully not too honest, a pruning down on the style front
P.
— unknown
this is good. Although I don't understand the question mark at the end of the first line.
— themolly
ah the potato
seated in front of life. done so well
sup is a fine word
(coincidently, i posted a music video i made yesterday, for a song entitled Requiem ... much darker than this, though)
— Bloodfetish
Hopefully this doesn't carry a ring of honesty -- but otherwise fine work.
— midare
Dear aerol
No sup; an old English word not much in common parlance that meant to drink excessively and riotiously.
Larry on the piste Lark
— larrylark
i really like your writing style. have you considered writing short stories, or anything like that, you'd be fabulous. i'd fly to buy a copy of that book.
— adiscodancer
a disco dancer
It takes me all my time to get a few may be poetic lines down. Stories seem so daunting. Thank you for your kind words.
— larrylark
like a sparkling drop of light
its very nice.
— jittery
Thanks Jittery
Nice to have a comment .I seem to have lost my touch on this site in the last couple of weeks
Larry out of ink Lark
— larrylark
Ha. This is refreshing in a very odd way. The American 'head-of-household' at its best?
— sunfeet
i like this a lot. in fact i like a fair few pieces of your work. love your writing style, it's bloody brilliant!
— wintersun
Dear Wintersun
You're comment has given me great cheer on a bleak and endless February morning
Larry yearning for spring Lark
— larrylark
I love this larry. It's poignant and very perceptive, and it has the ring of truth throughout.
I particularly like the detail in lines 8-11. My Dad used to use the cardboard insoles when I was a kid and money was scarce; plus he liked his old slippers.
Do you need the comma at the end of line 9? It would read more smoothly without it don't you think? I do like this larry. You need a whole book of your poems really as they are very special you know?
— smugzy
|
|
|