poetry critical

online poetry workshop

wait -a haiku

next in line for what
inevitably becomes
a very long time

21 May 05

Rated 10 (7.5) by 1 users.
Active (1):
Inactive (5): 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

(define the words in this poem)
(465 more poems by this author)

(5 users consider this poem a favorite)

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reading lines online
is like waiting for sunshine
at a funeral

 — unknown

there was lots of sunshine for mersault's mother in camus' 'the outsider'
 — hank

I like this. A lot.
 — FangzOfFire

exactly. mersault's mother. you took the words right out of my mouth. i still remember when you scrawled impulsive poetry all over a copy of the outsider (the stranger) as we drove down to ko chang from bangkok. and then when you split you gave it to me as a gift. still got it somewhere. but what the fuck does the outsider have to do with this poem?

i'm not sure if this poem makes grammatical sense but it does capture the feeling of longing and waiting in vain so i'll say "bravo." did you write it on another copy of the outsider?
 — ollylama

Senryu, you mean. Not haiku.
 — unknown

olly, that was 'the fall'.
 — hank

are you going to have heiny sex now?
 — noodleman

tsk, tsk, noodle.
 — hank

mmmm...makes me hungry for sushi.....
(which is japaneese...like a haiku...like this poem...get it? no? ok im done)

 — noodleman

good poem by the way.
 — noodleman

Nice poem.
 — unknown


i wish i'd known about you sooner. your stuff is really good.
 — listen

thanks listen.
 — hank

it's my turn for the long time...
read this.
 — varun

I wish the title didn't tell me it was a haiku.

This is one Empty haiku.  
 — WordsAndMe

A favourite!
 — Seahorse