| a fallen rainbow
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themolly
| yesterday it came to us driving down my street | 1 |
it crystallized before our eyes like pulled-sugar candy | 2 |
as we evaded the sadness pouring down from some great eye | 3 |
ra and i were struck with wide-mouthed hesitancy | 4 |
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yesterday a baby rainbow fell into the field across the street | 5 |
we'd never seen one that close up before | 6 |
it matieralized before our eyes like a swarm of bees | 7 |
with pixalated twitching and hissing | 8 |
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yesterday it went still while we were still flitting | 9 |
on the concrete porch with barefeet | 10 |
we paced just long enough to watch it leave | 11 |
it vaporized before our eyes like awakening mid-dream | 12 |
| 13 Jun 05 |
Rated 8 (7.3) by 6 users.
Active (6): 1, 6, 6, 10, 10, 10 Inactive (2): 3, 9 (define the words in this poem)
(51 more poems by this author)
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Comments:
I would take out the second still in l9. Not bad. — unknown
ooops. thanks — unknown
I am clueless. What are you trying to convey, please? — Isabelle5
oh so pretty — tragicbubble
isabelle-this is a personal spin on egyption mysticism
tragic-thanks — unknown
Don't try so hard.This is overblown through striving for effect and i don't think words like pixilated do anything for poems — larrylark
larry "jumping the gun" lark-
i like that word. i always wanted to use it. — unknown
Egyptian mysticism....got my lunchtime research cut out for me! I want to like all the poems so my mission is to figure this out. — Isabelle5
i love to collect strange Egyptianesque items. i've got a strange facination with the culture. it started when i began to look into things like Merkabic breathing, sex magic, and the tantra. — unknown
i dont think rainbows are ever alive — unknown
I like this one but ryhming the word "materialistic" doesn't seem to go well. — HeidiHo
Tell that to Tone Loc.
Anyway, I didn't use materialistic. I used materialized. — unknown
unknown,
i changed the title. — unknown
its about a girl isnt it or do poets even really think about what there writing of course the are supposed to be hard to understand but you can turn anything into anything you know thats how they are supposed to lightly exept in the middle of a book be — unknown
absolutely the best thing you've posted yet. when will you get the guts to post your REAL stuff? — Estrella
lovin it — tiedtoes
is this about Chino? — BoundFeet
Oh this is SO about Chino — unknown
eh what? — themolly
i can't even believe you would suggest such a thing STRELLA!?!?!?
anyways, thanks — unknown
L7 materialized
L8 pixilated
L10 bare feet
what is pulled-sugar candy? — inutile
yesssssssssssss.
it's half-way perfect — unknown
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