| Through the Eyes of a Saint
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bear
| Am I a good person? | 1 |
It depends on whom you ask: | 2 |
strangers, outcasts, and the misfits, | 3 |
will say I am. | 4 |
I care about them | 5 |
and share in their sorrow, | 6 |
they are my beloved. | 7 |
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am i a bad person? | 8 |
it depends on whom you ask | 9 |
my parents, friends, and family | 10 |
will say i am. | 11 |
i show great apathy for them | 12 |
and leave their troubles to themselves. | 13 |
they are the strangers in the world. | 14 |
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22 Jun 05 |
Rated 8 (8) by 3 users.
Active (3): 7, 10
Inactive (1): 7, 9
(define the words in this poem)
(157 more poems by this author)
(1 user considers this poem a favorite)
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Comments:
'vagrant'
is a word
that comes to
mind.
— midare
yes, agreed
— bear
'jail-bound'
a word that comes to my mind.
The person values the opinions of those who don't matter, and disregards the opinions of those who do. Quite ironic!
— SeanConnery
haha, i dont want to go to jail! but i think mostly thats how a lot of people live their lives... with fashion and wat not, not doing what their parents tell them too or their freinds... its kind of sad
— bear
The guy in the poem needs an intervention =)
— SeanConnery
lol! i've always wanted an intervention!
— bear
hail La Vie Boheme, my friend!
— sapphonix
i have a feeling i should no wat that is, but i don't. care to explain?
— bear
oooohhhh, i get it now. rent. classy.
— bear
i guess someone that doesnt know you as much, won't know how bad you really are. they would just see the person you present yourself to be in public, rather than in your own private life, like your friends and family. i wrote a poem about this kind of thing, sort of. it wasn't very. it was too simple, it didn't have the vocabulary you used, and the way you expressed yourself.
i don't understand why there are capitals and punctuation in the first stanza, but not really in the second. is that there as a technique to provide emphasis on good/bad, or were you just lazy? fix it up, please.
— Lia
the second stanza lacks capitalization and grammar just to illustrate good/bad, do you think it detracts from the piece?
— bear
as you read in my comment, i saw the technique, and understood it, but i think it just makes it messy. if it matched the first stanza more, it might hold more emphasis on the differences you are talking about.
— Lia
i kind of want to keep it how it is. so i will.
— bear
:D never be pressured into changing your poems. i hate it when people try to do that to me, so i'm sorry i was trying to do it to you. it's a fine line between suggesting and telling. i try only to suggest, but sometimes i get carried away by the goodness of the poems.
— Lia
its quite all right, i know you were just trying to help me and make this better!
— bear
I love this!
— abomination
thank you
— bear
I like this very much. I like the way you are viewed, depending on who is being asked. So true.
— Isabelle5
i remember when i wrote this, it seemed that people who knew me best thought i was extreemly selfish and the people that hardly knew me at all thought i was the best person in the world...
— bear
inverted is the way it seems to work. i remember hearing how you always hurt the ones you love the most. but it makes sense, doesn't it? you get to know someone and you discover the weirdest and worst aspects of this person. you're always with them, anyhow. so...yeah. it's all dealt with in that weird and inside out way. s:
nice poem. (;
— ducktape
So 'true,' but the execution of this failed to move me. Most people already know of this phenomenon, so the least you could do when using it as the basis of a poem is to present it originally, if not with some level of entertainment. for what it is and how it's be done, it's mediocre.
— unknown
thanks duckie.
sorry to disapoint unknown
— bear
Bear, there is something about your poetry... many of your poem (and I have read many) seem to be just ways for you to get thoughts out, like you need to free them from your mind and poetry is the best way.
Often you have such profound wonderings and sentiments, I think if you took just a little more time over some of you poems, rather than writing them straight out and not editing (this is the way I imagine you write) then you would have some of the most beautiful and deep poems on this site.
Remember that poetry is not just about a great idea, it is about saying it in a way that no one else could. I know you are capable of using all the incredible words, phrases, punctuation, liniation, syntax, and tropes that we English Language speakers have the luxury of. I hope you can grasp them all soon.
x
— musicwords
thanks a million. this is true, that is all i use poetry for, to empty my goddamn mind. i know i need to improve on my writing and i think it has by leaps and bounds since i joined this site.
— bear
You have advanced a lot bear, and I will always be around to read your poems with delight.
Yours,
x
— musicwords
Near perfect, the way you define my thinkung and feeling on the world. I must surely somehow know you.
Larry hands across the ether Lark
— larrylark
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