poetry critical

online poetry workshop



Don't Be Afraid, Because We All Are
SweetPain

We are all in fear of the same thing:
 1
exposure.
 2
 
 
Exposure of ones inner-self;
 3
our feelings,
 4
motives,
 5
desires,
 6
and perversions.
 7
 
 
So withdrawn,
 8
into our own insecure psyches
 9
we play our own mind games.
 10
Where, we then call for the expertise
 11
of psychologist (and sometimes a psychotherapist)
 12
to play along and figure out our secrets.
 13
 
 
It all seems so simply
 14
pointless
 15
to be so hidden.
 16
Because, at the base of it all
 17
we are all fucked up.
 18

i guess i was wrong, reading this poem now it seems finished. i just changed around stanza 3 and 4. but suggestions are always welcome :D

15 Sep 05

Rated 8.5 (8.5) by 2 users.
Active (2):
Inactive (2): 8, 8, 9, 9

(define the words in this poem)
(158 more poems by this author)

(2 users consider this poem a favorite)



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Comments:

lines 11 and 12 are so true. i really like this. im interested to see what else you are going to add.
 — bear

love it!
 — lonelygirl

thanks bear and lonelygirl. i hope you guys enjoy the switcheroo!
 — SweetPain

psychologist psychotherapist

this is good
 — themolly

thanks a bunch themolly.
 — SweetPain

i felt as if it was finished too. i just didn't say anything. very good! (9)
 — bear

better:)
 — themolly

This is excellent. I love it.

Probably true too.....:-) Or at least it feels true at 2.42am Greenwich mean time when I should be sleeping.
 — smugzy

thanks so much for the comments and encouraging words : bear,themolly and smugzy.
btw smugzy, to me everything seems to make more sense in the very early morning :D lol
 — SweetPain

it seems very conversational and revealing.  almost like something said when starting to really open up to a person.  
 — firstasianbo

this made me feel better.
hence a favorite ;-)
 — trochee

thanks guys :D
 — SweetPain

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 — unknown

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