A consumer of Bollinger Champagne,
and regular quantities of purest cocaine,
Mr. Aziz, astrologer,mystic, clairvoyant
will sell for a nominal fee, agreed
by private treaty,or taken from fixed price lists,
ointments,plus polished stones of medium size, which if kissed
against your penis or swallowed in a mist when your pubic hairs
are aligned with Venus, will effectively return defecting
partners,putting them back into immediate harness.
For an additional start up fee
you may soak your thumb in tea
made from holy tap water. This truly divine
tool will enable your ugliest daughter
to marry the foolish owner of a string
of grocery stores,guaranteeing
your freedom and accord,
a stake in life that soars,
while at the very same instant
giving immediate relief
from grief,disbelief, tantrums and commotions
in the street,plus other unmentionables
arising from disagreements or fuss
with extended family members,
who many times you have wished to dismember.
Rest assured, his work is not trivial,
but confidential and most convivial,
essential to the best of well being.
Ring now enclosing postal order or cheque
and may your all seeing lord bless you.