| degrassi
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onklcrispy
| i see you | 1 |
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with your corroded spiral stair locks | 2 |
your brittle purple wobbled out muppet eyeballs | 3 |
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ducky lips flopping about your lard chiclet teef | 4 |
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algebraic equations dripping from the cruxes of your elbows as you behave like a shopping cart in a thunderstorm | 5 |
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old courthouse paint chip smoke mutters underneath your natal flannel, sounding like a box of stale, hot chardonnay aching to give birth to proboscis varicose | 6 |
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haunted with the slack jawed dunce cap, soggy rice paper expression of your mother with her ancora checkbook | 7 |
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under fusty cereal mattress | 8 |
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the evolution of your golden coughs and your chestnut acne resides in the scent of your son’s squally pink eskimo cheek | 9 |
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3 Jul 03 |
Rated 7.5 (8) by 2 users.
Active (2): 6, 9, 10
Inactive (14): 1, 5, 5, 7, 8, 8, 8, 8, 9, 9, 10, 10, 10
(define the words in this poem)
(23 more poems by this author)
(4 users consider this poem a favorite)
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Comments:
Tripping over the words... like reading when you're drunk... still plugged in...bzzz... bzzz... loved it... reading a schizophrenics diary while falling down the stairs...
— declan
I don't know about line eight, maybe I have to re-read it a few more times. And I'm guessing by "teef" you mean "teeth". Otherwise, I think it is very compelling. Great job.
— unknown
you forgot the part where the one kid gets a boner
IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS!
— thinknerd
but, hey, whatever it takes, i know [this poem] can make it through.
— thinknerd
I changed the word "bed" to "mattress" in line eight. Yes, by "teef" I mean "teeth". As for the kid with the boner...he's on a bearded plane drinking mango juice.
— onklcrispy
have i mentioned that i love you?
— thinknerd
I thought I saw fireworks today...
— onklcrispy
...oh wait...it's the fourth of july
— onklcrispy
Fantastic imagery, well done from start to finish.
— unknown
This poem is utter nonsense; sorry!
— ersaph
sounds like it could be magnetic poetry...i like it
— britta
ersaph, just think, if this poem were about sucking on a cows dripping teet it would be "udder" nonsense!
— onklcrispy
Lame.
— unknown
brilliant and reeking with sorrow.
— capnorange
it just keeps getting better.
— thinknerd
thank you.
— unknown
youre welcome.
— thinknerd
There is something really special about this. I would like to hear it read out loud, I think the things rhat might potentially hinder it, could possibly add to it once it's spoken. I really like line 7.
— unknown
that last comment was mine.
— superboo
Throw your hands in the air x 17
— unknown
"you behave like a shopping cart in a thunderstorm" I adore that line. dkm
— unknown
bravo again. I look forward to your furtile thoughts!! You should publish!!
— tinkerman
Vogon poetry? Cool, just when you thought our ears were safe....
— unknown
i have to say i like pretty much everything about this poem :)
— dismantleme
Like all your other poems.. this one leaves me speechless
— Angelicfire
thats in a good way ;)
— Angelicfire
I watch that show.
Such drama for kids.
— pennylane
This poem is not about the television show. It's about a friend of mine who has fallen into the grips of heroin addiction. He's is an absent father, in and out of jails, lost soul, moderately homeless.
— onklcrispy
I don't get it :(
Who or what is this poem about?
— Skillmatic
i love "like a box of stale, hot chardonnay aching to give birth to proboscis varicose"
very nice
— kalika
humm i wonder who this is maybe . . . onk . . . I remember when we talked of pirates
— InMyBlood
You have such an interesting, unique style, onkl. I really love this one especially. I like the format you used and your terminology. Brilliant. I especially enjoyed line 5. Also enjoyed "your corroded spiral stair" and "evolution of your golden coughs".
— FataMorgana
fenom
-z
— zepplin42
a billion tiny seconds corroding into time.
bravo.
— ShelbyS
So puppet! C
— unknown
Sorry for your friend and your pain. I took it as cynical and I think it needs something more to enlighten the reader to the pertenance. Maybe you could animate the injection and the abuse of poppies for nothing but pleasure and their difficulties in trying not to take advantage of the process to spread themselves further in such destructive ways. And I believe you would be far more genius. C
— unknown
this is really confusing and i grew up watching this show. the way it's written is choppy and at times undistinguishable. The wording should be less complex.
— xtormentedx
if the poem isn't about the show then you should probably rename it. it tends to throw people off. and if it's about someone's decent into drug abuse it is still confusing because I'm not getting that at all, sorry
— xtormentedx
it isn't brilliant but degrassi is one of my secret pleasures
— unknown
hilarious
— onklcrispy
the diary of a madman. what can i say, i dig this kind of stuff as much as the more personal/from-the-heart poems. I admire your style of writing!!!
— witness
Have you ever seen the episode of Friends where Joey uses the thesaurus and every single word of a letter to sound more intelligent (see also: bright, brainy, smart, clever)? This poem reminds me of that.
— unknown
Haha, a typo in my own comment. I apologize.
— mi-esperanza
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