poetry critical

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Can't Be Bothered

He was there a moment ago,
regaling the office,
telling stale jokes.
about pear shaped
air conditioning.
"Do you wish to reply sir?"
"Can't be bothered to.
Type anything,
anything will do."
He took a sip of luke warm tea,
with a nip of whiskey neatly slipped,
leapt over laptops,grabbed his Homburg
hat,stood on his hands
like a circus acrobat.Jumped out
through the window clutching
at thin air,plummeted down
towards a concrete square.
"Never moved so quick
or showed such capability.
I thought it was way beyond
his limited ability" said  Mr. Pritchard
by whom he was employed,as if
the whole thing had been done
simply  to annoy.
Clerks stopped Shuffling,
huffling and a puffling,
bankers put their drafts
and craftiness aside.
All dashed to the window
some even cried,
like a communion of drinkers
sharing sour wine.
There he was
three hundred feet down,
an absolute winner
a pirouetting clown,
trampolining on the ground
floor shop front awning,
singing, somersaulting
thousands were applauding.
"Dark horse him," snorted Mr. P.
"Next he'll want a pay rise,
and a signing on fee."

8 Dec 05

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great stuff!
 — unknown

Larry, you seem to be everywhere, you've just been the random poem twice in a row today.

please, please do me the favour of spacing after commas and full stops. you appear to do that sometimes, but not very often.
L11 lukewarm is one word
L26 please uncapitalise "shuffling"
L38 trampolining is not even a word, but i guess poetic liscencing allows it. it should be a word, though, it's a good one :P (same with "huffling" and "puffling" on line 27. actually, i'd make "a puffling" "a-puffling" or get rid of the "a" or something).

super poem, it kept me amused all the way to the end :)
 — inutile

Dear Unknown

I am most grateful for your positive comment.
 — larrylark

Dear Unitile

Happy New Year and thanks for commenting
 — larrylark

Give the man a raise. And move the canopy.
 — unknown

I don't know why but I am reminded of Flann O'Brien.

Great read
 — unknown

Nice one - it reminds me of a world I've fortunately been spared from these many years past
 — Markjdrews