| This blank page of mine
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GalvanicGirl
| Empty, yawning | 1 |
full of a vast nothing. | 2 |
Encompassed by a | 3 |
latent, screaming | 4 |
fear. Trembling | 5 |
wishes combine | 6 |
with meek | 7 |
ambitions to form | 8 |
what? Safe | 9 |
words come | 10 |
stilted with | 11 |
no confessions | 12 |
to build them | 13 |
into something | 14 |
of worth. | 15 |
Sinful dreams | 16 |
and soulful | 17 |
days make for | 18 |
almost good | 19 |
words. But | 20 |
everybody | 21 |
knows... | 22 |
And so, | 23 |
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almost | 24 |
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good | 25 |
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words | 26 |
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t | 27 |
r | 28 |
i | 29 |
c | 30 |
k | 31 |
l | 32 |
e | 33 |
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onto | 34 |
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this | 35 |
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blank | 36 |
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page | 37 |
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of | 38 |
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mine | 39 |
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25 Jan 06 |
Rated 8 (9.2) by 2 users.
Active (2): 8, 8
Inactive (19): 7, 7, 7, 8, 9, 9, 9, 9, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10
(define the words in this poem)
(8 more poems by this author)
(3 users consider this poem a favorite)
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Add A Comment:
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Comments:
This is interesting. That and cleverly written. I like this a lot.
I pictured this as it were handwritten. That would make i really nice peice.
— Brando_O
with no in line nine needs something more, it seems lacking. and line 38 isn't really a line at all.
But this is pretty cool.
-delicate_submissive
— deli_sub
I LOVE this.
most definetely something I wish I would have written.
brilliant. 8)
— misspanda
Line 7 - meek, not meak.
line 12 - come stilted or become stilted? I know come works in the spacing but does it work in the poem?
It's an interesting shape. I like the flair but I would love to see the spacing changed at the end, tightened to single space so it does not continue down so far.
The form makes the poem, of course, the words are not that dramatic or exciting.
— Isabelle5
This is awesome. I always try to shape things with the ends of lines, not the beginnings.
Are you new here?
— povertea
Safe words *come* stitled and not good right off the bat. there is no becoming for them. My words have never been that dramatic, or exciting. Neither has my form, I'm afraid.
— unknown
I like most of the changes you've made. All of the word changes I like, but the format, now that you've shortened the spaces it seems off balance.
— deli_sub
better?
— unknown
Yeah.
— deli_sub
this format is good marketing.
— stint
ahhh, but is it good poetry?
— unknown
When you can learn to use concrete details, I'll comment on your piece.
— TaylorC
nice. sums up a lot of what we all feel.
— Trish77
original
— cliff
I sense thou art retarded. They aren't even almost good, my non-friend.
— unknown
Thank you, everyone.
... I think
— GalvanicGirl
The page even look blank! That is creative but maybe could have been a bit longer... I dunno if it is possible though considering your setting out....
— kingcrossy
Danke kingcrossy
Does it seem short to you? I thought it stretched out f o r e v a a a a r
— GalvanicGirl
this is very very very lovely.
— UN_Owen
Knock out layout. Teach me how to do that.
— larrylark
interesting... i like it.
— unknown
ahh..
i just can't get over how much i am in love with this poem.
8)
— misspanda
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