"For Christ's sake,
hurry up,she'll be here
to see him made up in a minute.
How in heaven did you cock it up?
Push on his arm,one two three heave.
No, it won't move, knock on his knee
tug on his sleeve, sit on the lid.
How on earth did you let rigor mortis set in?
I'm gonna have to saw it off
and hope she doesn't notice.
Pass me the drill and the hedge trimmer,
it does it quicker. Pull down the blinds,
It'll ruin us if she finds out.
Oh Jesus! look what I've done.
Trimmer slipped,took off his head.
Quick, stick it back on
with that industrial glue.
Here she is.
Pull the robe up to his chin.
Hello Mrs. Morte, do come in.
He looks twenty years younger
and really well; I always said
he was a good looking fella."