poetry critical

online poetry workshop



Feeling this is all I can do ...
AlchemiA

This tender agony of parting,
 1
Soul seared by sweet lament,
 2
Love is the goal of all other goals,
 3
Longing is the place that I am sent.
 4
 
 
Window of the invisible opens,
 5
The heart roiling by your Grace,
 6
I don't remember where I live,
 7
When you are all of over the place.
 8
 
 
The silent voice only the Heart can hear,
 9
Even my breathe is moved by you,
 10
That book of Love that you expose,
 11
Feeling this, is all I can do.
 12
 
 
Miseries are Divine blessings,
 13
You make them gifts so pure,
 14
Impressions lost to Loves devotion,
 15
Of this my Heart is sure.
 16
 
 
 
 
These eyes which clearly see,
 17
Only see shadows, partial images, dust and ashes;
 18
Mere reflections ... I am blind!
 19
 
 
These ears which soundly hear,
 20
Only hear echoes, random noise, modulated vibrations;
 21
Inharmonies ... I am deaf!
 22
 
 
These lips that move to speak,
 23
Only mouths nonsense, utters prattle, articulates nothing;
 24
Spacious double-talk ... I am dumb!
 25
 
 
These senses cannot grasp the ineffable, nor embrace the infinite!
 26
You are beyond the reason of mere understanding,
 27
I am struck deaf, dumb and blind,
 28
By Your enormity and mystery!
 29
Nevertheless, You are in this Heart caressed...
 30

30 Jan 06

Rated 9 (6) by 1 users.
Active (1): 9
Inactive (1): 3

(define the words in this poem)
(109 more poems by this author)

(1 user considers this poem a favorite)


Add A Comment:
Enter the following text to post as unknown: captcha

Comments:

A forced rhyme scheme doesn't help this poem, strophe 2 is particularly painful. You have some spelling to attend to (breath, not breathe for example).  It shows nothing, and uses such hokey and well-used phrases to reach the same conclusion that you dole out in the first strophe. The language is overwrought.
 — ka

Thanks Ka, I write to express my Hearts longing in the imprecise and imperfect world of phrases and words. The 'mind' panders to the mediocrity of criticism and barbed irreverence in the guile of wit and provocation! That's really the difference. This is essentially a journey with a pulse, not a dead catechism of forms and rituals!
All errors of style and spelling are Lovingly ignored! Especially whilst absorbed in the bliss of the infinite now, where I am neither compelled by the past, 'nor future beckoned. This is that Reality, Sister Heart!
 — AlchemiA

I flow with this. I really love  when you are all of over the place...

oh pro'se...
 — CrudeEcstasy
Top Rated (expand)
Newest (expand)
Recently Commented (expand)
Recent Best (expand)
design & code copyright donald tetto. all poems copyright their original authors.
0.043s