| On God Complexes and you.
|
shakeit
| About a lover.
About a friend.
About a girl.
| I love it when you're lying | 1 |
| |
naked underneath me, and I'm just drinking | 2 |
[you in.] | 3 |
| |
All those things | 4 |
I love, just the way I love them, | 5 |
exposed all at once, | 6 |
only for me. | 7 |
| |
I lean up, hover over you, | 8 |
and I'm admiring | 9 |
this form. | 10 |
| |
Those tired but lit up eyes, that smile, | 11 |
and that heart caged, | 12 |
[in those ribs, and it beats for me] | 13 |
| |
it beats for us. | 14 |
| |
| |
It's not about sex. | 15 |
| |
It's about me admiring you, admiring me. | 16 |
It's about me loving you, loving me. | 17 |
| |
Nothing between us but this skin. It's about the way that you against me [against you] makes me feel | 18 |
| |
Deep down in the deep, deep depths of.. | 19 |
| |
Somewhere I don't know a word for, | 20 |
[because it's too deep.] | 21 |
But I feel it there. | 22 |
| |
| |
The way your kiss electrifies everything | 23 |
inside of me and I ignite. | 24 |
| |
| |
I watched you walk away. | 25 |
| |
I couldn't help but think of the times I've been walked away from. | 26 |
You swore it would be different, this time. | 27 |
| |
Couldn't help but think about the form under the cloth | 28 |
as you walked away | 29 |
| |
for the third time in my life. | 30 |
|
11 Feb 06 |
Rated 10 (8.7) by 1 users.
Active (1): 1
Inactive (10): 6, 7, 8, 9, 9, 9, 10, 10, 10, 10
(define the words in this poem)
(32 more poems by this author)
(8 users consider this poem a favorite)
|
Add A Comment:
|
Comments:
Wow, I love this...so much.
— fallinforyou
well it has potential. i find it melodramatic and simplistic in thought.
— unknown
this very same thing happened to me but with a guy not a girl
i can totally fukin identify man
you rock
i do not feel alone now. no. not at all. i am not the only loser with ridiculous friggin dreams in this world. so i love you. cause you empathypithypittyingly
t ohave written this you must understand and put your shoes on headself too
and that is no small feet dude
you rock
long live poetry and big heads
— unknown
bravo, for many reasons, this one comes close to my home
not to mention, finding it, a nice stroll down some lighted street
called life....
wonderful write.
— LeeJ
i love this a lot.
this shows that its not just about sex, is it now?
i can totally relate and feel what's going on.
good going.
9
— mrtvo
oh yea, fav.
— mrtvo
I must say:
I saw the title and then read the poem and feel slightly disappointed.
I'm even more disappointed that this is regarded as one of PC's top rated.
Not to belittle this poem, but it's far from the best.
Personally I'm tired of all of the "it's about..." stuff.
I want you to SHOW me what it's about. SHOW me what this love -- not sex -- is all about. Stop telling me. Or at least, balance the two.
Also the brackets in places seem arbitrary or unneeded or are sometimes confusing.
Were I to rate it, I would give this maybe a six. It's sligtlhy better than average.
— unknown
agree with above, the title pretends the poem is something it's not
— marieF
Good.
Very good, in fact.
But the end could use some work.
And I agree, the title kinda sucks.
Actually, the title is great, but the poem has nothing to do with God complexes or anything of the sort.
(7)
— MEB
It's always about sex.
— unknown
actually, it does.
to hover over, is godlike. to watch over, is godlike.
to be the only one to have seen that part of her-- to me, that was godlike.
— shakeit
hmmm what is happening to the quality of the top-rated stuff on this site? again, so so average...
— modern_nomad
I really like this! there are many poems on the top rated list that deserve to be there jsut because people ENJOY them! we can all like whatever the hell we want, oh average one.
— unknown
ok shakeit. you are right, i should substantiate my "average" comment. the problem is I advise or constructively criticize when i have something to work with... here i can't find myself wanting to keep anything.....
"its not about sex".... are you kidding me?
— modern_nomad
"to hover over, is godlike. to watch over, is godlike.
to be the only one to have seen that part of her-- to me, that was godlike."
So, using your logic, an eagle, hawk or vulcher, helicopter, plane or other who hovers over something, an object or place is a god or godlike?
A mother, teacher, mentor who watches over her (or his) child or student, or a security guard who watches over his terrority, so to speak, is a god or godlike?
or a doctor, looking at an x-ray of a young girl, he being the only one to have ever seen this part of her, is a god or godlike?
Um. No. This poem fails and the title is poor-choosing.
— unknown
way to hide behind your unkown alias, you fucking coward.
and, no, your examples aren't godlike.
they're completely different than my poem, my example.
— shakeit
|
|
|