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I'll rent yesterday for promises
turtlepoet

yeah
 1
I didn't want to
 2
                and a part of me
 3
                                        wishes
 4
wishes I could
 5
        take back yesterday
 6
keep it
 7
         hold it
 8
                  bring life back
 9
                                        to what
 10
 
 
                                                    we
 11
 
 
                                                        destroyed
 12
 
 
when I said
 13
          I won't hold the decision
 14
                                                           to abort
 15
against you
 16
                  I meant it
 17
                                 and I won't
 18
            but
 19
when I say
 20
            that this was the first
 21
                                                       and
 22
last time
 23
              I meant it
 24
                                and it is
 25
 
 
I wish I could take back yesterday
 26
but I guess I'll let you keep the past
 27
as long as you promise I have the future
 28

11 Mar 06

Rated 1 (5) by 1 users.
Active (1):
Inactive (1): 1, 9

(define the words in this poem)
(47 more poems by this author)



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Comments:

Sorry, I just find these layouts detract from reading
 — unknown

the words are good, but unknown is right, the layout makes it hard to stay focused and really grasp the full meaning of the poem. it's distracting.
 — livedeeply

abortion tomato soup

cp
 — unknown

I enjoyed this, a 9 from me. I love this style and do not find it difficult,as one of my main Poetic influences, Patrick Jones, writes in the same way for some of his poems. I liked the words, and the layout.
R
 — Rousseau

I like this.
 — unknown

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