"Whats wrong with starting out renting?"
When we were kids,
council houses were a godsend,
Ours was a wonderful palace of a place,
with water in the bath tub, coal tar soap,
and brillo pads for scrubbing your face,
a large tub of lard to rub into your skin,
to keep out the cold icy nights.
Mother always asked brightly
where we'd been,
"Down the swing ma.
We hung young Sydney fingers
from his shoe laces
in the old roast chestnut tree.
I'll race back down and free him
before we have tea.
"Oh my golly gosh," she'd beam.
"Life is such a glory
for my strapping young sons,
always having fun."
I remember those shiny spam rissoles
on dads plate,hungrily waiting in line
with half a slice of Hovis bread,
to wipe in the grease
when he'd finished his feast.
We were always well fed
"More Daddy's Sauce daddy?"
Mum used to read us snippets
from Titbits Magazine.
JANE MANSFIELDS KNICKERS
FOUND IN ROMAN BATH FOOTINGS.
TONY HANCOCK BLOWS UP 23 RAILWAY CUTTINGS.
HAROLD MACMILLANS GONE STARK STARING BONKERS
QUEENS EQUERRY DROPS A REAL STONKER
We used to lie in bed at night under the gutters
trying to see stars through the smog.
Listening to dad throwing up the rissole
in the toilet bowl,between murdering the dog,
and mum calling from the back garden,
"Do you want me in the strait jacket
or the frogmans suit dear?"
with the neighbours all cheering
and shouting,"Wear the nurses outfit."
We turned out the light,bit our lips,
listening to him blowing like an old steam engine
as he ripped off the rubber."Is that how we arrived?"
asked my little brother,
who was too young to stoke his own boiler.
"Yep." said I in my best John Wayne voice.
"Sure is.Via the the nine thirty nine,
wrapped in a parcel,stamped all over,
delivered by the postman right on time.
Crikey! I forgot to untie Sydney, what a fool.
I'll do it in the morning so he won't be late for school."