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Spirit Of The Dead.
larrylark

You'd think after that send off,
 1
carried out to the letter,
 2
he would have thought better of it
 3
and stayed under, the sod.
 4
 
 
It's all became clear as water beneath a leaf,
 5
the hacksaw and drill,
 6
oxygen mask, bit between the teeth,
 7
a hammer to tilt at the lid.
 8
 
 
He has the nerve to sit there
 9
after years of abstaining,
 10
lips clasped round a cheroot,
 11
coffee and a fruit liqueur
 12
with two cute blondes,
 13
one on each decomposing arm.
 14

19 Oct 03

Rated 9 (8) by 2 users.
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Comments:

what's the reason for the dumb blonde cliche, eh??
 — unknown

I've no idea, he's married to one - a blonde I mean - not a dumb one.
 — opal

Dear Unknown

When will you reveal yourself as less than a cliche?
 — larrylark

I do like it. The ending make me laugh. :)
 — jessi

ughhh this is creepy, and poetry wise creepy is good because, that means i can feel this. overall its quite funny *chuckles*. nice JOB!
 — SweetPain

You need to fix the spacing around the comma in line 4.

:)
 — Lia

And maybe drop the full stop in the title?
 — Lia

Dear Lia

drop it where?
 — larrylark

Drop it off at the bus stop.

Bring a handkercheif, you will need it.

Saying goodbye is always so sad, don't you agree?
 — Lia

very nice. ending. such a snappy bit that really closes the poem.
 — listen

I like it :]
 — unknown

Did you hate him that much, you can really express your feelings, i like it.Hulda
 — Hulda

He isn't "fixing" the comma on line 4, because it shows two different meanings - #1. "Under the sod" and #2. "He... the sod". It works, but I think even if the comma were spaced normally it would still carry that dual-meaning.
 — dtgartman

Sorry for the overt speculation about the poet's intentions. I tend to do it a lot.
 — dtgartman

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