poetry critical

online poetry workshop

Fricasséeing Males

The rooster seems insatiable
in his assertive quest
for eggs beneath the featherbed
at the excretory vent below
every female poultry head.
The rooster crossed the roadway
near receding Great Salt Lake.
A mirage of many chickens
mislead him; his mistake.
That rooster ended roadkill,
fresh, albeit near half-baked.
(should've been a capon,
still, we diced it into stew).
In sunny fields of heliotrope,
think of yolks, and care for chicks.
The best sport is to grab a cock,
because when we are choking it,
amusing, how its eye betrays
tears for the surprise.

for Opal for smiles
for her LarryLark

31 Oct 06

Rated 10 (7) by 1 users.
Active (1): 10
Inactive (2): 5, 6

(define the words in this poem)
(181 more poems by this author)

Add A Comment:
Enter the following text to post as unknown: captcha


good first stanza.  and good alliteration in the last stanza/line.

Are you *really* referring to roosters, or is there a deeper meaning? Is this a commentary on men in general-because if so-I think it's a humorous poem.  
 — Artemis

Thanks for helping me, Artemis.  I suppose that humor poems are rare enough,
that when one clucks into view it's sometimes hard to be sure---Yes! It's a black humour poem here! Yes, it has ironic meanings, as you may agree.  And it's a new poem that I'll gradually hone better over time.... and a slow fire... roosters are tough.  NEed sLow stewing before they learn to be tender.  Poor chicks! grins, thanks, reid.
 — netskyIam

Black humour indeed netsky, that i like a lot. i think you have a really original voice which never ceases to intrigue or make me laugh. The first stanza is excellent in terms of its sly and subtle double entendre, timely and well worked enjambement and rhythm.

As the poem gets going, the rhythm is sacrificed for the plethora of images that come in - I saw KFC, I saw a Coen Brothers film, I saw Road Runner. i think that both works but distracts a little.

The sudden introduction of a field of heliotrope and the sunny outdoor pursuit was a unexpected pleasure, but also funny as is the aphoristic endings; as you say a little work is need - on the middle perhaps, but please don't stop writing poems like this netsky - I love 'em.
 — opal

typos - sorry - 'an unexpected pleasure'
'aphoristic ending'
 — opal