Do you know what its like to be stuck on the roof?
with the family away your all on your own. The ladders
in pieces down on the lawn, where it shattered the bones
of next doors pet cat.
You’ll have some explaining to do after that.
Do you know what its like to lock yourself out?
lurching after the bull dog that peed on your mat,
crapped on the hat that your gran wears to church,
you’ll have some explaining to do after that.
Do you know what its like to get drunk as a skunk?
mistakenly clunk open you neighbor’s front door?
stagger upstairs grope bedroom door. Vague recollections
of a fight in the pub. Slugging it out with barman
called Billy, while gran sang along to a juke boxed Bo Diddley.
You get into bed with their teenage daughter, thinking
your cuddling your wife as you oughta
You’ve got some explaining to do after that
Do you know what its like when you finally arrive,
put on the chip pan, gas heat mark five. Fall asleep
on the sofa and when you awake, bonfires are burning
all over the place.
You’ll have some explaining to do after that
The tail of the bull dog has blazed to a char,
the cat o’ nine lives is covered in scars,
granny and Billy are still on the booze,
Wife’s gone off with Pedro on a round the world cruise,
and the girl from next doors yelling sexual abuse,
you’ve got some explaining to do after that..