I gazed upon that firm well rounded head,
wondering why he suddenly had stopped.
The noise of childish play had ceased,
the toys that ran round with him now did not.
He stared at something glowing as he strayed,
into the farthest corner of the room.
Saturn's rings of dust were blown away,
and all the stars collided with the moon.
A candle flickered though the air was still,
while outside fiery comets flew on by.
Within a single moment he was man,
and in that very second did he cry,
"All's vast and yet times never vast for us,
we live within the speaking of a curse.
Watch the clock slip by as watchers must,
its hands glide through each grievance that we nurse."
The glow spread out so steadily it shone,
my small son's form eternal, close at hand.
Then within one second he was gone,
time swept him as winds sweep the desert sands.
I picked an object up from off the floor,
felt cold and darkening shadows gather by the door,
Looked far beyond the planets spacious swell,
heard the empty laughter ring in heaven and in hell.
18 Jan 08
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Pulls the reader in; there is a story behind this...
there is a story behind this. You see it all started when i was bouffonting my luxuriant pubic hair when a meteorite flashed past so close it severed my penis.
Larry not so cocky now Lark
It always inspires me to greater heights of crapdom when you dam me with faint praise. Thank you poetry William for all the good you have will and are doing.
Larry has been Lark
just get me into heaven
You sick with good old Uncle Larry and I guarantee that instead of roasting you'll be coasting, bathed in celestial light.
Larry heaven is a place Lark
a lyrical verity so human with imagery that sweeps the mind of clutter and touches the Heart with a sighing song; it's impermanence all along! Well writ with verity and wisdom in it!
l7/8 are beautiful, larry.
apostrophe for time in l13?
there is a hint of sadness under all that almost-delirium. good poem, larry.
what you said means a lot to me.
You could be right. I think it is a cry into the darkness for humanity.
Larry silently screaming Lark
i have just commented on a poem thinking it was one of yours (police came to my door with a search warrant - in your favourites-section i think), saying that commenting on any of your poems is not really necessary as i find all of them absolute genius. that's true.
Isn't the title a bit cliche?
The diction of glowing/glow did not crystallize well for me, and the introduction of Saturn, stars, moon, and planets into the poem wasn't as strong.
"dust were blown away", "sweep the desert sands", "heard the empty laughter" - these are cliches, right?
My dearest stout
You can call me what you like but I cannot possibly comment as it would break my vow of silence.
Larry the mysterious world of lark
I know I know and I have to exercise all the power that my right hand possesses to stop it writing phrases like gossamer wings, tendril trail, jumping jabberwocky etc. etc. so every so often I succumb and allow myself to float on a raft of cliches till my hearts content and then i go back to being unhappy again.
Larry easy like Sunday morning Lark
After reading the comments regarding the incongruity of Saturn, I immedicately thought of Goya's painting "Saturn Eating His Own Children", and thought that that fit here, for some reason. My initial reaction when I read this was that the child has autism? Then I read down and now I'm not sure if the child has autism, or the parent just wishes that they had the child back in the form that s/he always used to be. Or maybe both :P
If writing is therapeutic for you, Larry, that's no problem. Life is short to fiddle about those as one poet said reducing her poem into two lines from an original long line.
well well, another enjoyable read. Love the blending of, oh, it all (could go into detail but I'm already windy enough, tee he hee). I too thought an apostrophe needed in L13, however I was surprised when I read Joel's comment on the familiar phrases, 'cause yeah they are familiar but I didn't even blink when reading them (and indeed would not have picked up on it at all w/o reading comments). Hum. Meter threw me on (scrolling, scrolling...) L's 2, 22, 24 since the rest seemed to be in i.p. Did I just scan incorrectly, or was this on purpose? Nice work; kudos.
I usually don't know what a poem is about and this is no exception. I just started with a bunch of words and a grandiose plan to convey the vast pointlessness and arid emptiness of the universe and here we are with a 6 mile high life support system which enables us to enjoy the unique beauty of this wonderful world and all we can do is systematically wreck it and become just such a place delineated in this poem.
Larry dead world lark
I do plenty of fiddling but some I just take as they come.
Larry once in a while Lark
your comments are really helpful and I am most grateful for that.
you've captured my heart in your work, with all the ways a parent feels for their son. this poem touched me deeply.
yes, this lovely random produced a single tear, trickling down my cheek.
i've missed you. hope you're doing well.
My tears are locked currently but they wish to flow for this poem, all the children, all the parents, all the pain. Beautiful job.
The title is also an X-Files episode, by the way.