poetry critical

online poetry workshop



untitled (Writing, as a form...)
netskyIam

Writing, as a form, a way, to live on, in a sense,
 1
of being remembered, as if words never die, words to make
 2
images and emotions to carry in our minds, to pass along, as if continuance,
 3

9 Mar 08

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welcome back reid.
good to see you back. where were u?
 — trochee

running a trailer park in ocalola?
 — joey

sri-i-ously, what is form, and writing is in forms, as in, speaking in tongues, as in, gossiping about the most outrageous gossips. being remembered is to remember what you understood and remember how to write it so that it seems said -- nothing is real, but your writing is the most real thing. how many of us here, netsuku, would You want to be reminded of? we're so vulgar, dude.
 — joey

oh, yes, this comes off, writing-wise, as one of those thoughts which have to be written because they're so hard to remember and seem so real, so to the point. but, the poem points off to the right, and wanders into chat-box, with so much said and so little being said. what is being said here? it is almost a poem -- it's almost weaving us into confusion so that we can resolve rationality into rhythmic cohesion -- almost a magic show --

wa, -- as a wa, an on in a sen
of bee ng re mem ber'd

as ifff wordz
nevah dye

words
2
maak

him-age-essz
and emo-shuns

2CarryInOurMindz

to paazAlong
as
con-tin-wants.

...

more formal, no?
 — joey

Hi joey.  It's just didactic in attempted poetic form.  Sincerely tendered, it ends on a comma.  I don't know why--this bit is finished, really it is.
 — netskyIam

well, you know that we have to necessarily differ on this thing called "poetry". nothing didactic, in mike land, can be a poem, cause the didactic part is what we do unto ourselves as we write, and the giving part is when we allow our sensibility to be open for the reader, simply seen. the problem for me starts with "writing", since this is a piece of writing, and i'd like to really see, if this were structural, a breaking down of the writing into atomic energies -- the components of emotion. then, summing it back, like John Donne, say, you'd put the poem together, after the prosy parts, and show the reader what you thought a poem should look like. i think that's the higher road here, the way to really share and be with the reader.
 — joey

Maybe you should dump the 'to' in line two.
 — unknown

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