|a philistine smoke with rapping feet
Philistine smokes atop rapping feet herald the tongue slapping bard,
therein lies Turkish silver nights
'neath the frequented city sky,
whither ashes tumble,
veered from exhales of steam trails dispersing.
Jonah frowns for each happening as Bartholomew speaks
for to scavenge the collective hindsight;
beckoning the forgotten phantoms
once conjured within eyeshot,
whilst the ease of changing winds sooth each singular pain.
The bygone boy remembered to one left rambling short,
cast by turns of clouded infinity,
wandering roads with pariah prances.
16 Oct 08
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Brilliant! You are one of my favorite poets. Whoever you are!
good arch and baroque writing -- procul harum without melody, what he'd read in the paper -- between the lines. impressive construction, a costume piece from the days of charles the second, easy rider kingdom of slap-me once, i'm in love, slap me twice, i'll kill you. partial infinities.
this is just bollocks, sorry.
perl before visual basic, dud. it's a working piece of art.
i'm not learned in eras, but baroque seems swell.
as for bollocks, i've got a pair.
yah uve got a pair - of pube
this is another trite poem writing in a diction centuries old, and doing it inaccurately...... and somehow tricking joey into thinking its good. Which is a bad thing.
it's about poetry for me and this one's got some style and that thing 'composition', which is like a subtext dialog with the reader made up of kinetic movements. it's flavored writing and there's nothing wrong with that -- it's not meant to be authentic diction, you feel, but it's not offensively pretending, in a Mor or less insulting anti-intellectual way, and that's rare. i don't write 'easy' and i'm always impressed with writing which simply lays back and allows a atmosphere to build around the cadences.
imagine -- but maybe this is too antique now -- joni mitchell singing this slowly and articulating this out for you. i think you'd feel it then.