poetry critical

online poetry workshop



andrew
hank

you yell howl and i howl hell
 1
daddy-o! love karoke when asked
 2
you a balloon wake up breaching and scarred
 3
bloody how do you say it where you are from?
 4
i am only just awake enough to help
 5
nervous you seem to take no notice
 6
of sun shower towel tap you gently
 7
riddled bullet holed body is- plugged?
 8
 
 
and to all inanimate objects i am
 9
throughout the day equal for you
 10
and you ask why why why of all
 11

15 Apr 10

Rated 7 (7) by 1 users.
Active (1):
Inactive (0): 7

(define the words in this poem)
(440 more poems by this author)



Add A Comment:
Enter the following text to post as unknown: captcha

Comments:

I liked more the first revision, less cluttered, less thought about, him not you.

Liked plugged, silly walk-mans.
 — unknown

look,look
get a blog
1st was much better.#
silly boy
 — sir_I_clan

like lines 5-8
 — psychofemale

0.249s