poetry critical

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First TV (1953)

Heard so much of Little Weed,
Bill and Ben, Flowerpot Men.
Cisco Kid, Looby Loo,
Rag Tag and Bobtail too.
Sat watching at my mummy’s feet,
5th TV in our cobbled street.
She popped off to bake a cake,
i wanted wooden hand to shake.
Got dad’s tools out of the drawer,
undid the back , placed on the floor.
Popped in my head, pulled a wire,
they must be sleeping, very tired.
After all that acting stuff,
grandma says its so much guff.
Poked screwdriver deep inside,
no one there, began to cry.
A sudden loud almighty boom,
threw me clean across the room.
What a punch Roy Rodgers got,
took days recovering from the shock.

Guff an old lancahire term for rubbish related to speaking i.e. He's talking guff

8 Sep 10

Rated 8.5 (9) by 2 users.
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breaking in an out of rhyme like this makes it seem eccentric writing. so, i'm going to have to read this again to find out what you're doing. and, for me, the t.v. came in '52, and the first superman, so i get the point. second read, this reads like you were just typing out some brilliant stuff from your head and couldn't help yourself, but the story-plot got in the way of a new epic, and you had to come down to earth. just like superman.
 — bmikebauer

jeez, larry, is this a docu-verse? ...true life picture of pancho's creative urges?
 — bmikebauer

Probably Mike, I have so little lift off these days i can hardly remember the days when i thought i was superman which of course i wasn't

Larry broken wings Lark
 — larrylark

well, from experience, i have to tell you that drinking more milk and eating lots of sugar will fill up your wish-tank. i was surprised greatly to see this as yours... but! if it's the first step towards junking an old and worn-out style and inventing poetry all over, than that's worth having read this one.
 — bmikebauer

hahahahaha!  This sounds like the 50's, by gosh!  The end is hilarious and scary at the same time.  Roy got the punch, huh? What did you get for busting the set?
 — Isabelle5

 — psychofemale

Every good poet needs to stick a fork in a socket at least once in their lives.
 — technomancer

Yes indeed Mike, those old worn out styles get into such deep grooves i think therapy is needed to get out of them

Larry shrinking Lark
 — larrylark

Dear Isabelle

Surely you must have realised by now that Larry's poems , like the author are a total fabrication but it doesn't stop me being made up by your reply.

Larry the figment Lark
 — larrylark

Thanks PF
 — larrylark

You never know what's real.  I recall vividly my oldest brother working on a lamp socket and my youngest bro helpfully plugging it in.  Bill lit up and then burst into tears!  Joe was only crawling then but he came upon the plug and knew that it was supposed to go into that hole.
 — Isabelle5

Life can often teach never to be forgotten lessons in perculiar ways Isabelle.

Larry filosofer king Shallow
 — larrylark