poetry critical

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If she were cremated, would the smoke still smell of brownies?

Barbara Billingsley, 1916-2010

It's five a.m., and I'm just making the bed,
and tucking in
an icon, June
Cleaver is dead. How domestic,
even oddly
eclectic, the thought
of her head -
a darkened
pillow. (Let's
color the case
red.) Soon
old June
will blithely console herself - no line-drying
wash, no
rising of bread - only
     eternal quaking blankets
     of tangled
     earth to smooth.
     And a living chenille
     of grass spread -

18 Oct 10

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bit scary and intriguing at the same time.
does the name lizzy mean anything to you :)

19-22 i like the idea of the grass spread, gives me an idea for a photograph,, Thanks much.
 — ghost

I find it a little bit ironic, no she will not bake for you again and I hope she is resting quite peacefully. Hulda
 — Hulda

Eloquent tribute.  The line breaks work well.  Tidy write, great title.
 — sybarite

I like this a lot...esp the subtle yet pronounced rhyme scheme...but forgive me for being so unlearned, but what does the title have to do with this? I feel as if today poets just slap on some odd ridiculous title with their poem like pb&j except the pb is soy butter and the jelly, well its Welch's high fructose corn syrup glop

enlighten me
 — unknown

was this mem to sylvia?
 — ghost

Barbara Billingsley, aka, June Cleaver, passed on Saturday.  Google it if you're not familiar with "Leave it to Beaver."  The title is perfect if you know the background.
 — sybarite

i love chippy poems.
11-14, fun. and 3-4.

the title is what gets you the 10.
it is so up my alley.

17-20 gorgeous.
 — mandolyn

This is quite good.  Leave it to Beaver was a staple in my house when I was a child.  I especially liked the way you added color to a show that was filmed in black and white.
 — PaulS

thank you, all, for the comments.

just another domestic goddess passing.

the whole happy-homemaker thing is at once gloriously comforting and dark, if you ask me; not to plath, no, but she echoes in the narrative and rhythm for sure.

will add in the dates and the actress' name to make it clear.

thanks again. will glady repay the comments. (nicmichaels)
 — NicMichaels

to unk: the title isn't random. it's specifically tangental. (nicmichaels)
 — NicMichaels

Nic, this is a wonderful write.  the rhyme scheme is immaculate, the line breaks and the flow are just tantalizing.  
i think you could do without one of the 'ands' either line 1 or 2.   probable 'and tucking' is a minor problem to me.  think the mid sentence comma in L1 is also omittable.  
hmm, is the word omittable even formally accepted into the english language?  it sounds awfully strange, but it works.  :)

enjoyable read, you have a unique gift,
 — Estella

the beav's mom, ya ok,, its on syndication/tvland?

i do so like the grass spread... i will send you a photo. :)
 — ghost

I remember watching the re-runs.  nice poem for BB.  you exhibit some mad skills on this one.  well executed.
 — JKWeb

really liked the final five lines.  Fabulously evocative.  thank you.  love riverjay
 — riverjay