poetry critical

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bathroom spill
faith

I contemplate now,
 1
s{h}itting at the loo,
 2
what it really is like
 3
to be crammed in a zoo?
 4
 
 
Where rhinos and horses
 5
and elephants too,
 6
All run around bare
 7
like most Chimpanzees do
 8
 
 
I suppose life is like that,
 9
a bit of a poo
 10
a zoo 'quipped with booze
 11
and Cadillacs, too.
 12
 
 
A zoo of abandon
 13
where owners have left,
 14
and all that they've kept
 15
is the hope and the zest
 16
 
 
And 'ways when it's our turn,
 17
we give it our best
 18
We're miserably failing,
 19
yet raise we our chests.
 20

28 Nov 10

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Comments:

(:
 — unknown

Keep right on to the end of the poo

Larry land of bogs Lark
 — larrylark

Yes life is a bit of a poo.
 — Ansel

:)) Larry land of bogs Lark; wish I was born with a name like that, it'd make life less pooey.
 — faith

I like this because I know you, but line 20 is your best here methinks.
17 is interesting too though.  'ways.... as in "always"?  very creative
 — Haxxen

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