poetry critical

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blue bottle
hank

the fly has to stop! before landing!!
 1
the sapphire bottle wont break
 2
no matter how hard you throw it
 3
'the blue bottle cannot land with noise'
 4

for G wherever he may be.

19 Dec 10


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Comments:

this is perdy abstract...
 — NicMichaels

A blue-assed fly short. Leave out the friggin' excamation marks!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and there's and apostrophe in won't as it it's a contraction. Four lines of fly-bottle allusion, hank, won't make this a gem - this is a seed of something a little deeper.  
 — unknown

Canada.

Merry Christmas

x
 — sir_I_clan

I used to love Bombay Sapphire
but now I fancy Guinness.

Nice poem
Happy Holidays from Canada, Hank
=-)
 — jenakajoffer

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