In culinary art, honey is my medium and my muse,
And two orange slices compose two butterfly wings.
Every piece I make is eaten
With equal joy as a painting brings.
My canvas is rose red with strands of white
And when I paint, I use the spices:
Turmeric, oregano, chili, and old bay.
I use them on a salmon caught by a friend yesterday.
17 Jan 11
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I really liked the first two stanzas, but the last didn't do much for me.
I do like your visuals in the first two stanzas though, could almost taste and smell them. :)
Yummy first two but the third stanza is definitely preachy and superfluous - mitch :-)
If you want to buy real estate, you would have to get the loan. Moreover, my father all the time utilizes a credit loan, which supposes to be the most useful.
Perhaps it is superfluous and preachy, and perhaps it isn't.
It is my opinion that it is neither because this is the thought in my mind, not in concept, but through experience and understanding.
Yes the first two stanzas are nice, yes, but without the third all it is is a pretty poem with an interesting idea. I will try my best to address the fourth stanza to make it more artful and at the same time more expressive of this idea.
I hope this last stanza is better. Thank you :^3