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Barbie in a Coffin
JKWeb

Barbie strolled with Ken
 1
down the runway.
 2
One of her heels broke
 3
and she lost her footing.
 4
The crowd gasped
 5
as Ken struck a pose
 6
for blinding cameras.
 7
He was okay, he had on sunglasses.
 8
 
 
However, Barbie couldn’t see
 9
and when she got to her feet,
 10
she stumbled, fell from the catwalk
 11
and bashed her plastic head.
 12
 
 
She was dead-
 13
 
 
Three small girls
 14
buried her in the backyard
 15
next to a fish and a hamster.
 16
Ken was pleased
 17
because he now had the spotlight
 18
all to himself.
 19
 
 
The girl who owned Ken
 20
went shopping at Department-Mart.
 21
To his dismay, she picked-out
 22
a brand-new Barbie.
 23
 
 
Her and her mother
 24
approached the check out,
 25
“How will you be paying today?”
 26
the cashier asked.
 27
“With plastic” the mother replied.
 28

17 Feb 11

Rated 10 (8.3) by 6 users.
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Comments:

i thought the ending would be "paper or plastic?" asked the cashier

funny. love everything above L24. not sure about the ending, maybe omit 'with' in the last line. but i think it would also read well with just the cashier asking "pape or plastic" --you may completely disagree and think that is crap. it probably is. :)
 — mandolyn

*paper
 — mandolyn

i find it cute when barbie is buried next to a fish and hamster..egoist Ken!
 — unknown

great stuff  plastic love or hate beats emo into a cocked hat

Larry cocked Lark
 — larrylark

  Lol how clever.
 — Intervention

Interesting concept Webster, but this one needs work.
 — unknown

Is it just me, or do you seem to have a fascination with dead women???
 — unknown

thanks for reading and critique mandolyn.  glad you liked up to 24.  will have to give your suggestions s'more thought as I'm slightly attached to the way it is for the time being.
 — JKWeb

many thanks unknown.  fish and hamsters.  r.i.p.
 — JKWeb

thank you too larrylark for reading and faving.

JK grateful Web


gracias Intervention for the 3-word plaudit.
 — JKWeb

hello unknown(s),

actually, I'm fascinated with women who are alive.  lol.

thanks for having a look anywhoo.
 — JKWeb

This made me laugh, thanks for that!  I could have pictured the purchase of a burly GI Joe, too, totally different ending for Kenny.

I think you could delete some lines, such as 17-19.  Also unless Ken went along on the shopping trip, he wouldn't have been dismayed until they got home with the new doll so maybe you could show Ken happily alone at home and then show his dismay when he realizes the dream house wasn't his for long.  And I'd still love to see Gi Joe in the mix!  

I also think the broken shoe is a ruse, Ken really gave her a nudge, right?  He pushed her off the track.  Come on, it's doll play, tart it up!
 — Isabelle5

thanks Isabelle-- glad you got a laugh.  will give this another look this weekend with your suggestions in mind.
 — JKWeb

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 — unknown

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I'm sorry, this is remarkably dumb.
 — unknown

I think you're holding back unknown.  Tell us how you REALLY feel.
 — JKWeb

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