poetry critical

online poetry workshop



Bend
cvanbloom

When I feel small,
 1
weak and worn,
 2
 
 
I think of
 3
the things you have taught me:
 4
 
 
Do not smile
 5
with your mouth closed.
 6
 
 
Do not eat
 7
anything with bones.
 8
 
 
Do not walk
 9
at night without shoes that click.
 10
 
 
Do not cower.
 11
Do not stammer.
 12
Do not fail.
 13
 
 
And should you find yourself
 14
fighting a losing battle,
 15
change what it means to win.
 16

10 Apr 11

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Comments:

last bit "is" the poem. ... rest is lead---up, superfluous. lose the 'and'.. .. thanks.
 — unknown

like this
 — unknown

last stanza, what bad advice...  that's like military policy in iraq.

its also the opposite of line 11.
 — unknown

I loved this!
 — faith

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