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around and about
AlchemiA

we're all bubbles of consciousness, brilliant in our shimmering hues, bouncing and bullying each other around while looking for ways to merge with each other; leaking through our surface tension, we're wiggling 'n jiggling for that 'special' one come to burst us free to really be who we ought to be -- life is real only then when I am bursting at the seams of what I thought reality means ...
 1
 
 
it
 2
begins in ʎʇıxǝldɹǝd.perplexity
 3
as the absurd.pɹnsqɐ man
 4
arrives at the nature of reality
 5
 
 
without conclusions ʎlsnoıƃılǝɹ
 6
without religion ʎllɐɔıʇılod
 7
without politics ʎllɐɔıɟıʇuǝıɔs
 8
without science ʎllɐɔıʇsılɐʇɐɟ
 9
without fate ʎlƃuıʍouʞ
 10
without knowing ʎlqɐʌǝılǝq
 11
without believing ʎlǝʌısnlɔuoɔ
 12
 
 
perfectly ʎllɐɔıxopɐɹɐd.paradoxically consciously pǝʇɔılɟuoɔ.conflicted
 13
with all these incongruities converging into the
 14
moment he crosses the street;
 15
his-heart
 16
still affected by the dark
 17
restless sea of awareness --
 18
 
 
bent before his fierce-vulnerability,
 19
he's an innocent victim like you and me,
 20
lost between infinite-Love and "I'm not worthy"
 21

11 Apr 13

Rated 10 (7) by 2 users.
Active (2): 10
Inactive (6): 1, 1, 1, 10, 10, 10, 10

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Comments:

consider omitting the 2nd "bubbles" in 1?  diggin' a lot otherwise.
 — JKWeb

thankS JK and done ... works better to immerse yourself in the context... Thanks oblivion
 — AlchemiA

what in tarnation?! how did you do that?? haha, wow.  ok way beyond me, but it looks fantastic.  I really enjoyed the words in the first para, as well as the last.

clever boy,
and way over my head ;)
 — jenakajoffer

¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤ the whirl'd turned inside of you, around, about, as whirls do, and when a sigh escaped, you passed, alas, from ecstasy into the crash...¤•"*~♥~♥~

thankS jenakajoffer it's around and about the head versus heart, as-in where to start or where you bend the whirl'd from your joy again ...
 — AlchemiA

Bravissimo!  I need 2 go take an Advil because at times in this poem, I was standing on my head to read it and now I'm dizzy.  I'm diggin' the philisophical nature of this piece.  It's deep, sincere and immensely relatable.  :-)
 — starr

The first stanza comes across as new-age preachy. Bursting at the seams... too familiar, I think. to really be [who] we out to be.

I believe that structure can strengthen a poem, but I can't see past the gimmicky nature of the upsidedown and backward words. Seems like the nouns should get the treatment, rather than their modifiers.

But three able poets have added this to their fave lists, so... what do I know.
 — unknown

starr-yman you're awesome -- thanks for the kudo's

unK - ya'know you're right -- preachyness is so Longfellow -- however, I'm working at combining Romantic poetry with minimalism -- swell with feeling and do not tell -- an attempt and yeah it's gimiky -- nonetheless I'll keep trying
 — AlchemiA

I belong to no religion.
My religion is Love.
Every heart is My temple. ~ Rumi
 — AlchemiA

The test of a free society comes when they're put under duress -- may love bloom in the hearts of men and believers learn to think again...
 — AlchemiA

"Live as if the crumbling order has already collapsed. Plant dreaming seeds of possibility, as you till the soil with the compost of this decaying paradigm. Cease your participation in it. Resist. Dream. Create. Organize. Live your life as a question addressed to the soul of the world and live your way into the answer." -- ArKane Atticuss
 — unknown

and you flew like an angel, spreading arch of light, for the wing, the only begotten son, oh-be-one, doing yer' thing
 — AlchemiA

where'd three 1's come from???
 — AlchemiA

got that too. stand firm against numeric slander!
 — DeformedLion

conclusively and fatalistically perplexed i will be. but without conflict.
 — mandolyn

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