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ducktape

For the past few days, all I have been
 1
thinking of is all the memories we've had,
 2
and there have been so many.
 3
I can't believe all that I'm recalling, it's so overwhelming,
 4
and it's not just the big heavy happenings, it's the
 5
smallest ones, where you and I are at a store, or going to the laundromat, or laughing watching
 6
cartoons together.
 7
Listening to music together.
 8
The uncomprehensible moments where we drift in and out of sleep,
 9
Repositioning ourselves and our covers and fall back asleep together.
 10
Decorating a clock together.
 11
Running errands together.
 12
Meet me in my mind.
 13
Meet me in my dreams.
 14
Let me hold you close once more.
 15
I miss you so much I cannot take this separation any longer.
 16
We have had so many memories together, three years of memories.
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And then, suddenly, you're gone.
 18
Everything is just,
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gone.
 20
Void.
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Done.
 22

not meant to be a poem per say, just needed to vent somewhere.  in a lot of pain right now.

25 Jun 13

Rated 9.5 (9.8) by 2 users.
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Comments:

take what you need, and move on. i have been here recently and can only say, that something greater and more meaningful is waiting just beyond your peripheral vision.

wonderful poem full of longing and i really love the ending.
 — raskolniikov

thank you, raskolniikov.  it's so hard.
 — ducktape

Dear Duckie,

You're right, it's not much a poem as it is a confessional of emotions, and I'm grateful for your footnote. Let me add though, that I felt your pain as real as I've ever felt it in my own life. Thank you for having the guts to share it, and hopefully you will heal soon.
 — jenakajoffer

And what is a poem Jen, but a confession of emotions?
 — unknown

a searing effort...great flow...you really got something out
 — larrylark

So raw, so relatable, so FILLED WITH the utmost vulnerability.  Been there and it's soooo painful.  My prayer is that you heal gently in time and that you are strengthened and beaming brightly again very soon.  Also in L10, I'd go with the gerund "falling" instead of "fall" so that it agrees with "repositioning."  Be well and keep a lot of good, positive people around u.  It's a death of sorts.  :-(
 — starr

Could have sworn that this was an anonymous poem, but just noticed your name up there, Duckie.  Everything'll be alright and you're in my prayers.  Hold tight.  Big hug.  :-)
 — starr

My heart aches for you and your void.
 — lalita

yes, it is hard. the pain of the heart is so much worse than physical pain. but it gets easier. i had to let go of someone i loved dearly who no longer wanted me in her life and at first i went out of my mind. but after time, i healed. the same will happen with you.

write about it, talk to your friends, travel and dont forget to cry, cry as much as you can. it will help you heal.

take care of yourself.
 — raskolniikov

L9 - did you mean "incomprehensible"?

I really liked the title and through to L8 - plainly simple, yet visceral.

Was very pleasantly surprised to see you again K - you dropped off the radar after you stopped posting on lj. Hope things get better for you - hit me up for a chat if you're interested :)
 — wendz

together is written 6 times.
this is a journal entry without any poetic merit.
 — unknown

I'll concur with the above unk.  I didn't catch all those "together's" the first time around.  Maybe keep the first one and scratch the rest?  :-)
 — starr

Thank goodness for the footnote, it saved me from reading the piece more than the one time.

I might suggest that what has been written here could very well be worked into "poem form", with some thought and effort. Perhaps the author would consider choosing some of the more important points of the piece, then adding some concrete image to bolster them in a reader's mind.

For example:
and it's not just the big heavy happenings, those bulky backpacks my heart is lugging around, it's the smallest ones, the little mouse scurrying at the back of that store we went to, or the tiny old asian woman who smiled when she saw us kissing at the laundromat, or the minions laughing behind Gru's back, like we laughed.

Good luck.
 — jArE_hAwK

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