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you're warm like a tasty rock

he said
after explaining that pets
are not food, but food
can be a pet
found in the wild
then he explained how to cook
a salt water crocodile
something about their tail
being the tastiest
and if they're cold blooded
then won't want to cuddle
i stopped him
at p.s.
because i knew he would admit
to licking my belt
before i could say 'it's mine'
but that was a different clamp
and i was editing a gringo
when hell came in with a lisp
saying 'thorry i wuth late,
my frothy clay-brain thweared'
tell me more about their belly
i said
tagging him
with my raised eyebrow
"they're tender
and they don't eat your children"
he replied four minutes later
after i had already deleted
a tumor on my wall
then his eyes turned into
street lights
as i slobbered a sentence
onto his face,
i want to break dance in that disco
i said, opening a new tab
canada can't be real
i thought
but he gave me banff
after i sobbed.

11 Dec 13

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I love it

- This is a fun story :-)

I've actually eaten crocodile - a few times - it's expensive here, a restaurant delicacy ( so i haven't eaten it much )

but the best i had was with a mango salsa --

it was my aunt's food, I'd ordered something boring, but i made her swap with me


it tastes like fish but with the consistency of steak.

have you eaten it?

kangaroo is wretch tho and what puts me off it is:

a. it is black (ish)


b. wild kangaroos are always full of worms --

so i think that probably even farmed kangaroos have a propensity towards worms

and don't wanna eat those dirty mothertruckers

i hate kangaroos, i love crocodiles

and I enjoyed this poem

 — PollyReg

thanks, polly.
it's an 'inside' thing between me a couple canadian wart hogs
other wise known as boys.
i warned them i'd write a poem.. :)
 — unknown

i can't spell tonight! my fingers keep sticking to this old keyboard!
 — unknown

 — unknown

well, you know what you say about inside things!

inside what, anyway?

you say this quite often, what does it mean this "inside thing"

inside a tea cosy? inside a golf caddy? inside yo mamas biggy smalls?

inside a cat. inside the moon. inside the shaving cabinet of grandaddy phil.

inside a bee keeper is a bee sting

(at all times. and it has to be, otherwise he'd be no good at his job)

inside my mouth, inside my bellybutton, not inside my vagina and three times inside your butt

inside OMG, inside social disease, inside the OBGYNS--

Go inside Selina, Tommy

inside she did a bad bad thing (baby)

inside, i'm glad i'm not an insider, but darling, inside, the poem is still mine

and inside, you know it  ;-)

 — PollyReg

She is an Insider. That is why we like her. She doesn't spout her mouth like most women.

 — unknown

^ i can spout. i do it sometimes, but then i shut my dirty mouth and read. :P

polly, dang! i meant this is one of those fun poems -- when you're in a conversation that goes wacky and you immediately start writing a poem about it in your head.
but it really happened. that's the best part. no fantasy here. just some crazy friends with jacked up brains. :-D
 — mandolyn

Yeah, it was fun - It made me laugh

Made me want to eat crocodile or chew your cute little nubs ;-)

I think one of your friends slipped you a roofy if this is a true story (i only just learnt that word roofy at work -- lol, they tease me because I'm not down with the lingo -- they tell me things mean all sorts of things)


never to be an insider - lol shucks.

your poem is mine, lovely
 — PollyReg

jacked up is a funny one too --

or "eshay" - i think that one means yes -- and i was like what does that mean, eshay - because my sons say it all the time --

and they are like, it means bongs --

and I went home and I'm like, "you guys are in trouble, i know what you're  talking about..."

:-) lol
 — PollyReg

^ ha!! i have never heard that one. i know 'essay' like .. "whut up essay" like whut up bro...

i'll never forget the time i came home and called my brother a dildo.
i'm all "hey dildo!"
my dad was furious. i had no idea what it meant. i just heard some kid say it to another kid at school. i'm pretty sure he washed my mouth out with soap.
 — mandolyn


I think eshay might be an oz thing - makes me think of the song "boys light up" by australian crawl ---

Oh mandee, i like that story about the dildo (how did that become an insult?)

It's funny


 — PollyReg

i just noticed the similarities in L33 and L40
 — unknown

^ yeah, s's and bb's -- something attractive about them
 — mandolyn

dude, i'm so way lost.  by 16 i don't know where this is going, it's really odd, i think you're talking about facebook, and then there's a canadian and i know it's not me because we don't have crocs here, except the kind you wear on your feet and they're pretty ugly.  i liked tagging him with your eyebrow, that's clever.

banff is awesome, but again i don't know what direction this poem went it.
 — jenakajoffer

joffer- it's about a fun conversation involving me, zadraph (who is mark) and a guy named richie. and yes, from facebook. i love my canadian family :)
 — mandolyn

^^ which you are a part of as well! :-D
 — mandolyn

I was waiting for that, lol.

Yeah you're a nut.
 — jenakajoffer

i posted this poem to my poetry page on FB- there is a picture that richie gave me in reply to a picture i gave him and that is where it all started - our crazy convo back and forth including others. i met these hosers through my friend samantha who i've known internet wise for years-- i find it funny how all my closest friends on there are from Canada. lol. i just love you guys :)
 — mandolyn

We are a cold bunch, but we are warmhearted!
 — jenakajoffer

^ yes, and funny and up my alley. the only people who get my sense of humor. oh... and timmy is back O.o
 — mandolyn

What is viagra generic low price for women - and does it even exist?  
 — unknown