poetry critical

online poetry workshop



trinity 1945
cadmium

what if a nicer atom gave us flowers,
 1
and tokyo surrendered its heart in gratitude;
 2
a million japs had flowers to eat,
 3
and sang flowers back as japanese,
 4
and
 5
all
 6
that
 7
went,
 8
and
 9
all that's gone,
 10
come back as ghosts
 11
and leprechauns.
 12
 
 
what if a sweeter bomber dropped gardenias
 13
on the feathers of the emperor's black duck --
 14
much happiness,
 15
great luck to the children
 16
born instead of blind
 17
and gone.
 18
and
 19
all
 20
that
 21
went
 22
would live alive
 23
today,
 24
but, younger;
 25
the atom bomb
 26
took so much
 27
yesterdays.
 28

12 May 17

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;-)

https://youtu.be/e5AIisWNvM 4
 — unknown

the nature of my game? older than the devil. original good, except on occasion.
 — cadmium

what great mouth feel. tbh this is really good.
 — DeformedLion

irony meets idealism to drop a bomb in our reflections on the imagery there-in -- what-if critiques we're made with the awe-of-alacrity instead of malevolent soliloquies -- what-if poets we're bones that sprouted flowers -- what-if words had an effect upon reality like some abracadabra simile-smiles that changed the course of dis-course -- loved the play here Cad and the implicit music  
 — AlchemiA

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