First if you must curse my existence please curse in silence.
I would like to die without drama.
Second do not talk to me as if I have a command of the English Language. So f'n ignorant.
Third respect that I can haul my body weight many times faster than the fat fuck uber addict that you are.
Fourth understand I hold no grudge against you. And so I ask that you do not release your teen angst, menopausal outrage, racist slurs upon me as I expire.
Fifth yes I have eaten your cheeto crumbs, scraped the skin off your back, watched you masturbate without any remorse or pleasure whatsoever.
Sixth if there is a shadow or crack in the wall or furniture do not get upset if my itinerary is predictable. I do not have much choice like a fancy tourist.
Seventh in the time you take to pick up your slipper and hurl it towards me a regiment of clones have already invaded the woodwork of your house, the plumbing, the back of the oven.
Eighth flushing me down the toilet is preferred as my relatives will get to see me off.
Ninth no we do not all look the same. Personally I have 8 pack abs extending to my hemi thorax and no hint of cellulite.
Tenth why do you masturbate so much? Really? As a species that is top of the food chain you sure got a lot of issues. Wash your hands for the love of god I feel dirty around you.
Eleventh I lived in your Hanes for at least a year and fucked you without you knowing.