poetry critical

online poetry workshop

Sia the Unregistered Goldfish

Empty chair backs,
wafting smoke
from old-time fields
burning and pulsing
in drought-like conditions
a coil trembles like a springtime leaf
--onslaught of cloud,
the skies are objectively weeping
from steely eyes
the table legs are offset
like tines, or a mirage
welcoming the
of cancer smoke

19 Jan 18

Rated 9 (9) by 1 users.
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this is a pretty taught poem. The last line can be construed as off-putting, unless that's really the direction you were going for. Cheers
 — unknown

Two words i can't bring myself to put in any poem are gossomer and tendril. I like the sparse imagery here.
 — larrylark

О себе: фильмы 2017 смотреть хорошем качестве бесплатно новинки
 — unknown