poetry critical

online poetry workshop



My River
ehalburn

My River
 1
 
 
I wait by you, mighty River.
 2
River strong and vast,
 3
River whose torrents
 4
I've so often longed
 5
           To dip my feet.
 6
Oh how my heart swells for you
 7
And the touch of your familiar mist.
 8
For many times I've gazed long
 9
Into your sun-kissed surface,
 10
Mesmerised,
 11
           Only to find my own reflection.
 12
Your passing pains my heart, dear River.
 13
For soon you'll leave my banks behind,
 14
To turn the bends and offer tides anew
 15
And form ripples whose acquaintance
 16
            I haven't made formal.
 17
It’s true, that once
 18
You crashed your waves upon me;
 19
Churned your current along my shore.
 20
But impurities gather in a stagnant surf,
 21
Becoming a place for scum and soot
 22
           To fester.
 23
Your plight is kinetic, sweet River.
 24
My sweet River.
 25
Lest turn stale, you flow.
 26
You may never cease, only wind,
 27
Surely to take my heart
 28
           When you go.
 29

24 Jul 18

Rated 8 (8.3) by 2 users.
Active (2): 8, 8
Inactive (1): 9

(define the words in this poem)
(6 more poems by this author)



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Comments:

Good flow of consciousness
 — rivergood

Nice flowò
 — unknown

It's a lovely song the shore sung to its river. This song contains so many details I love, like line 5-12, give me a beautiful picture of love and self-love.
 — Roc1Knight

chanyuan2018.08.29
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