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A triple beauty

After watching a picture of a nude woman‘s back

I saw a triple beauty, from the bottom to the top.
First is her hip, tight, thin and round.
Then goes her hair, flow down across her shoulders,
that falls suddenly stop at the slender waist.
What makes the viewer wonder,
is the last which arouse her life force.
A white rose's scent explains her sculptural standing,
the desire has her enchanted.
And the woman herself,
to me has the same toxic smell.

4 Apr 19

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"A white rose's scent explains her sculptural standing",thats really fucking good....

i don't know how to critique other peoples stuff without seeming like a douche..
but if i was to change things- if i had written this,
i would change the last couple of lines to:
"Yet the woman herself,
to me has the same human smell"

but perhaps the meaning might be lost for you, and is maybe a weaker poem.
 — mr_e

mr_e, a same opinion was been advised by a e-friend of mine. So I post the same reply: "I was describing the same condition I faced. Which she was freezed by the rose's magic smell, and I was freezed by this woman too. Like a hero before the Medusa. In order to break the spell, I guessed I had to curse her smell."
 — Roc1Knight